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Careers for Magical Creatures: Fairy Godchild Intake Form

Sarina Dorie is the author of award-winning, YA paranormal romance novel, Silent Moon. Her Puritan and alien love story, Dawn of the Morning Star, is due to come this year with Wolfsinger Publications. She has sold over 80 short stories to markets like Daily Science Fiction, Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, Orson Scott Card's IGMS, Cosmos, and Sword and Laser. By day, Sarina is a public school art teacher, artist, belly dance performer and instructor, copy editor, fashion designer, event organizer, and probably a few other things. By night, she writes. As you might imagine, this leaves little time for sleep. You can find info about her short stories and novels on her website: sarinadorie.com.

This form is to be filled out by clients before a fairy godmother can perform her duties determining the breadth and scope of a quest, suitable spells to aid a godchild, and when it is appropriate to play magical matchmaker at balls.
Fairy Godchild Name: Theodorus Charming
Sex: Indeed, often please!
Occupation: Prince
Other aliases: The Most Eligible Bachelor In All the Land, Mr. Eye Candy, Mr. Tongue Candy, A Fairy Godmother's Wet Dream Come True, etc.
Personal Philosophy: Swords weren't made to stay in scabbards.
Hobbies: Attending balls, amassing shoe collections, slaying dragons (literally and figuratively), rescuing damsels in distress, and perfecting the kind of kiss that will wake a princess from a hundred years of slumber.
Quest objectives: To boldly go where no prince has gone before. And while I'm at it, I should figure out something heroic I can do along the way to bring my family and myself more prestige, wealth, and honor. By Jove, maybe taking over a small kingdom would do!
Who will be affected by this quest? Me, my worshippers, and my future conquests.
Why is this project being undertaken? My parents want me out of the castle doing something productive with my life that doesn't involve partying at balls. They said it's either a quest or Humphrey's School for Wayward Princes.
If you weren't a noble on a quest, what would you be doing? I think you mean, Who would I be doing?
What is the timing/duration of this quest: I can go all night long, baby!
Assets: Wealth, jewels, a shining set of armor, a body builder's physique, a handsome face, and qualities such as charm and modesty too.
Weaknesses: A fairy godmother with a beautiful smile and sexy pair of wings. Yowza!
Comments: My qualities can't be defined by mere words in an intake form. What do you say to a private conversation? My palace or yours?
The End
This story was first published on Wednesday, August 3rd, 2016

Author Comments

When I think about fairy godmothers in fairy tales, they are always old women and a little ditzy. I imagine there must be times they would get jealous of Princess Charming and want that prince all to herself. Since I write about a former fairy godmother who lost her position due to kissing Prince Charming on the job in Wrath of the Tooth Fairy, this code of conduct was an exercise in understanding the world better. At one time I thought I was writing about a single fairy who fell from grace due to her taboo romance. In writing this piece I realized that there must be many fairies who fell for that tutu-chasing prince.

Other stories from this world can be found on Daily Science Fiction at: Dear Jezzy or Careers for Magical Creatures. Several "Dear Jezzy" stories have been performed for live audiences as part of No Shame Eugene, a live variety show which features 5 minute acts. To watch videos of "Dear Jezzy" stories, visit: sarinadorie.com/writing/news.

- Sarina Dorie
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