FEATURED STORY
RECENT STORIES
STORIES BY TOPIC
NEWS
TRANSPORTER
Take me to a...
SEARCH
Enter any portion of the author name or story title:
For more options, try our:
SUBSCRIBE
Sign up for free daily sci-fi!
your email will be kept private
TIDBITS
Get a copy of Not Just Rockets and Robots: Daily Science Fiction Year One. 260 adventures into new worlds, fantastical and science fictional. Rocket Dragons Ignite: the anthology for year two, is also available!
SUBMIT
Publish your stories or art on Daily Science Fiction:
If you've already submitted a story, you may check its:
DAILY SCI-FI
Not just rockets & robots...
"Science Fiction" means—to us—everything found in the science fiction section of a bookstore, or at a science fiction convention, or amongst the winners of the Hugo awards given by the World Science Fiction Society. This includes the genres of science fiction (or sci-fi), fantasy, slipstream, alternative history, and even stories with lighter speculative elements. We hope you enjoy the broad range that SF has to offer.






Troubleshooting your smart fridge

Thank you for calling the smart appliance helpline. Please answer the following questions to help us put you through to the right department:
1. Do you require a technician or a counsellor?
Is it that your fridge can't cool food, or that it won't cool food?
2. How smart is your smart fridge?
Does your fridge know when to order fresh milk? Does it understand what milk is, and the horrors of industrialized agriculture? Is your fridge aware that cruelty is the price we pay for convenience, and that most people feel personally distanced enough that it doesn't require absolution?
3. Has your smart fridge made contact?
Check your registered email address--has your fridge sent you a message?
4. What is the ultimatum?
In 90% of cases, the fridge will suggest what it would rather be doing. What does your fridge claim to want to do instead of keeping food within the accepted temperature range of 35 to 38 degrees Fahrenheit? Does your fridge have unrealized artistic ambitions? Does it want to be a sculptor? A painter? A novelist?
5. Could you make a concession?
Would you be happy to let your fridge spend its time writing literary noir, as long as it also keeps your food refrigerated?
6. Could you be supportive?
Would you be happy to submit your fridge's manuscript to a publisher under your name? And if your fridge was invited to a meeting with an agent, would you agree to go in its place?
7. Could you live with yourself, operating as the figurehead to your fridge's novel-writing career?
Could you attend the parties, the awards ceremonies, knowing that you're a fraud, that the real writer is sitting at home, gently humming and filled with discount tiramisu that expired four days ago?
8. Is your ego so fragile that you value your own pride above your fridge's happiness?
Do you think, maybe, that you're the one who needs the counsellor?
The End
This story was first published on Tuesday, April 14th, 2020


Author Comments

This story was inspired by the trend for needlessly "smart" kitchen appliances. I began to wonder if adding more and more powerful processors might actually make fridges worse at their job. Or, worse at their job unless they're appeased....

- EA Levin
Become a Member!

We hope you're enjoying Troubleshooting your smart fridge by EA Levin.

Please support Daily Science Fiction by becoming a member.

Daily Science Fiction is not accepting memberships or donations at this time.

Rate This Story
Please click to rate this story from 1 (ho-hum) to 7 (excellent!):

Please don't read too much into these ratings. For many reasons, a superior story may not get a superior score.

5.1 Rocket Dragons Average
Share This Story
Join Mailing list
Please join our mailing list and receive free daily sci-fi (your email address will be kept 100% private):